The Inner Circle

This has been on my mind for a while now.  You know, ever since I've started my business (Socially Yours - branding and social media marketing -- sociallyyours.ca -- check it out....tell a friend! *wink* haha) I've encountered a lot and I mean A LOT of nay-sayers and negative people along the way. 

I'd tell someone about the idea with excitement and vigour only to hear: "Why don't you just get a full time job somewhere?" or "Is that going to make any money?" or "Hmmm good luck with that" (with a heavy dose of sarcasm). "How are you going to support yourself like that?"

And at first, to be honest, I thought well maybe they're right....I have a ton of responsibility and I need to be "rational". So I did it...I went out and looked for a job...I got an interview and my heart wasn't in it at all! I didn't want the job (mind you I need to make money) but I just knew in my heart that it wasn't for me.  Needless to say when I got the call telling me I didn't get the job I did a little happy dance because to me that was my confirmation that I needed to press forward with my dreams. 

And it got me thinking.  Why do some people insist on pulling others down?  Is it because they have dreams of their own that they are too scared to pursue?  Or is it that don't believe in themselves so there is NO WAY they can believe in anyone else?  

It was then I realized that you can't rely on everyone to support you....that’s why you need an inner circle.  Your Inner Circle is a group of people who are supportive and reassuring and forward thinkers who genuinely believe in you and therefore will believe in what you do.  They know who you are and what you stand for and therefore can be a voice of reason.

Now please don't misunderstand what I'm saying!  I am by no means saying that you need to surround yourself with 'yes (wo)men' who will agree with any old thing you say, but you NEED to surround yourself with people who will say " if you're bold enough to believe...count me in."

The reason I say that you don't need a bunch of nodding heads is that there are times when an idea needs a dose of reality to ensure that you're on the right path, but, those in your Inner Circle know how to keep you in check without crushing your dreams.  They want to see you successful so they make sure that you are always doing your best!

And it's not that those who seem to be 'against' you are inherently evil people...they can be the nicest of people, BUT their hearts just aren't in a position to help you.   They always have a negative outlook on life, or they always try to make their problems seem bigger, badder, more intense that yours.  Most times they don't mean to be that way, but the reality is that they are.  Rest assured that you don't have to accept it.

You really need to evaluate (and consistently re-evaluate because people do change....) the people you have closest to you...the ones you talk to and text constantly, the ones you sit with at lunch, the ones you Facebook and twitter often.  Do they encourage you?  or do they only tell you what you can't do?  do they help build you up? or consistently tear you down? Are they energy suckers?  (You know, the ones who ALWAYS expect you to fix each and every single problem in their life.)  Or do they breathe life into you with encouraging words and actions?

The more time you spend on ‘them’ the less you have for yourself....you only have a certain amount of energy to spend each day....don’t waste time/energy  on people who won't make you better.  

And to those who aren't with you, please don't be afraid to show them the door.  Let's face it, you can't move forward, if you are constantly spending energy on convincing people that you or your ideas are good enough....you'll never get ahead! 

Keep in mind that you may have to be the one to make a change....be it taking a different route, or eating lunch with different colleagues, or staying off of Facebook (or other) chat or whatever you need to do to stop the cycle of negativity....and it while it may be an inconvenience, isn't that a little better than having to justify yourself at every turn???

I’m working on my Inner Circle which I need more now than ever!  I’m happy with the people who are around me so far and I'm looking forward to adding new and inspiring people to my Inner Circle.

Maybe it's time you take inventory of those closest to you and make sure your surrounded by the best...that way you'll be your best too! 

.....as always.....comment.....discuss.....let's start a dialogue.....peace n blessingz.....

13 Years Old On Facebook??? I don't think so!

Oh Zuckerburg what will you come up with next?

I personally don't think that children13 and under should be allowed on facebook.  It's a bit much!  I thought the whole point of keeping children off Facebook was to protect them from stalkers, child molesters and other such scum of society???  Now I realize that there are probably tons of underagers on Facebook (this wouldn't be the first instance of underage activity right?) But at least this way someone is being (or at least should be) held accountable for for the actions of this minors.  there is a lot of responsibility thtat is attached to being online.  and I son't think that 13 year olds understand the implications of such activity.  for example, there is a geo-tagging feature that is attached to many smart phone that allows your location to be posted for the world to see.  Can you image a 12 year old posting..."Crap!  Took the wrong bus and I'm lost!" I can see the predators lining up waiting to grab a hold of that unsuspecting child.  or what about a post like "Rocking out to the Biebs on full blast cuz the rents are gone!" Suddenly the doorbell rings and the rest isn't pretty.  Now I know these may be seem a tad on the extreme side but are they really????

Lets not forget to talk about all the bullying.  We've seen too many instances in recent history  that involve online bullying and harassment.   This is just another avenue for kids to be attacked and harassed by hurtful people both young and old.

Let's face it....adults have a hard enough time dealing with the goings on of the Facebook world....how do you expect a minor to do it as well?

A friend (@mikeselfdestructs said it best...Zuckerburg is trying to tap into that last market that Facebook hasn't cornered (paraphrased).

I think we need to let kids be kids and not allow/force them to grow up too fast. Get them outside and enjoy soccer games, and ballet and all the other things that life has to offer.....they have the rest of their lives to be on Facebook!

What are your thoughts?

....as always....comment.....discuss.....let's start a dialogue.....peace n blessingz....

There's Just Something About A Black Woman

There was an article  published in a 'professional' magazine that had a study 'justifying' why Black women are the less attractive than other races.  As a response I decided to post a poem that I wrote that outlines that beauty of Black Women around the globe.  


...enjoy...


There's Just Something About A Black Woman


Nothing against any other creed, colour or race
Or any other person from any other place 
But they just do not possess her grace
There’s just something about a Black woman

She is the definition of strength
Both in character and in truth
It surely is not in the pudding, it’s all in the proof
There’s just something about a Black woman

When she walks through a door time seems to freeze
Gliding through, each step with ease
Men who watch her get weak in the knees
There’s just something about a Black woman

There is something about her sweet full lips
With healing power in each kiss
And that slight sexy switch when she moves her hips
There’s just something about a Black woman

And each foot has walked a mile
Worn and bruised from treacherous trials
But on her face an enormous smile
There’s just something about a Black woman

She sticks to your ribs when times aren’t so good
And rejoices with you in the moments she should
Doesn’t matter if she’s from Wall Street or any street in your hood
There’s just something about a Black woman

She has a sense of style that is unmatched
Will get her hair did and leave that light bill for last
But will drop that last $20 just to hold on to the gas
There’s just something about a Black woman

She can turn $5.00 into a 5 course meal for 6
Can turn 2 matchsticks into a palace
Can dry up tears with a sweet embrace
There’s just something about a Black woman

She has the strength of an ox with the tenderness of a kitten
Will go to the ends of the earth for you if she’s smitten
She knows the greatest chapter in her life has yet to be written
There’s just something about a Black woman


So the next time you have a Black woman in your presence
Be sure to hold her and let her know that you in essence
Appreciate her standards of complete excellence
There’s just something about a Black woman

Love all the Black women around you!



.....as always...comment...discuss.....let's start a dialogue.....peace n blessingz........

Metafor Clothing – a brand with a purpose

Metafor Clothing (which stands for Mastering our Exixtence (spelled wrong intentionally) Through Achievements while not Forgetting Our Rights, Race or Religion) is one of the newest clothing lines to hit the scene.  And you are probably thinking: “So what? What makes them different from the other dozens clothing lines that emerged this month?”

The reason is simple.  Metafor Clothing is a brand with a purpose.


Our countries, states, cities, neighbourhoods, communities and even streets are filled with children who are being raised in less than ideal circumstances including living in impoverished neighbourhoods, experiencing a lack of food and water or even clothes on their backs.   These children deserve nothing but the best, but when they have to struggle from day to day to do the things we take for granted; survival becomes their only method of existence.  Unfortunately, this existence propels the vicious cycle of delinquency and many become statistics.

The cycle has to end somewhere.  You can help make that happen.

Metafor Clothing (a division of Metafor Enterprises LLC) aims to help children grow and flourish in the midst the struggles of growing up in conditions that are beyond their control.   Metafor Clothing is fashionable, affordable and helps to change the course of the lives of the youth today.

Proceeds from every item Metafor Clothing sells goes directly to Meta4Lfye which is a non profit organization whose goal is to help kids manage their exixtence.  Meta4Lyfe will fund programs that will help the youth learn study skills, writing skills, analytical thought skills, money management and so much more.  These programs will help keep the next generation of young people off the streets and out of jail cells and into the boardrooms and corner offices (with a view).

Supporting Metafor Clothing does more than just give you something to wear.

It is helping to sow a seed of success in the lives of children who more than deserve a chance at the best that life has to offer. It allows them to dream big and therefore be bigger than their circumstances; big enough to be the next world changers, policy makers, CEOs and Presidents.

For about $20 you can look good and feel good about doing a little something to make this world a better place.

For more information or to help make a difference please visit http://metaforclothing.bigcartel.com/

*** Limited time only...15% off with PROMO CODE: METAFOR***

*all italicizes bits are from http://metaforclothing.bigcartel.com/about-metafor