Monday, May 30, 2011

The Inner Circle

This has been on my mind for a while now.  You know, ever since I've started my business (Socially Yours - branding and social media marketing -- -- check it out....tell a friend! *wink* haha) I've encountered a lot and I mean A LOT of nay-sayers and negative people along the way. 

I'd tell someone about the idea with excitement and vigour only to hear: "Why don't you just get a full time job somewhere?" or "Is that going to make any money?" or "Hmmm good luck with that" (with a heavy dose of sarcasm). "How are you going to support yourself like that?"

And at first, to be honest, I thought well maybe they're right....I have a ton of responsibility and I need to be "rational". So I did it...I went out and looked for a job...I got an interview and my heart wasn't in it at all! I didn't want the job (mind you I need to make money) but I just knew in my heart that it wasn't for me.  Needless to say when I got the call telling me I didn't get the job I did a little happy dance because to me that was my confirmation that I needed to press forward with my dreams. 

And it got me thinking.  Why do some people insist on pulling others down?  Is it because they have dreams of their own that they are too scared to pursue?  Or is it that don't believe in themselves so there is NO WAY they can believe in anyone else?  

It was then I realized that you can't rely on everyone to support you....that’s why you need an inner circle.  Your Inner Circle is a group of people who are supportive and reassuring and forward thinkers who genuinely believe in you and therefore will believe in what you do.  They know who you are and what you stand for and therefore can be a voice of reason.

Now please don't misunderstand what I'm saying!  I am by no means saying that you need to surround yourself with 'yes (wo)men' who will agree with any old thing you say, but you NEED to surround yourself with people who will say " if you're bold enough to believe...count me in."

The reason I say that you don't need a bunch of nodding heads is that there are times when an idea needs a dose of reality to ensure that you're on the right path, but, those in your Inner Circle know how to keep you in check without crushing your dreams.  They want to see you successful so they make sure that you are always doing your best!

And it's not that those who seem to be 'against' you are inherently evil people...they can be the nicest of people, BUT their hearts just aren't in a position to help you.   They always have a negative outlook on life, or they always try to make their problems seem bigger, badder, more intense that yours.  Most times they don't mean to be that way, but the reality is that they are.  Rest assured that you don't have to accept it.

You really need to evaluate (and consistently re-evaluate because people do change....) the people you have closest to you...the ones you talk to and text constantly, the ones you sit with at lunch, the ones you Facebook and twitter often.  Do they encourage you?  or do they only tell you what you can't do?  do they help build you up? or consistently tear you down? Are they energy suckers?  (You know, the ones who ALWAYS expect you to fix each and every single problem in their life.)  Or do they breathe life into you with encouraging words and actions?

The more time you spend on ‘them’ the less you have for only have a certain amount of energy to spend each day....don’t waste time/energy  on people who won't make you better.  

And to those who aren't with you, please don't be afraid to show them the door.  Let's face it, you can't move forward, if you are constantly spending energy on convincing people that you or your ideas are good'll never get ahead! 

Keep in mind that you may have to be the one to make a it taking a different route, or eating lunch with different colleagues, or staying off of Facebook (or other) chat or whatever you need to do to stop the cycle of negativity....and it while it may be an inconvenience, isn't that a little better than having to justify yourself at every turn???

I’m working on my Inner Circle which I need more now than ever!  I’m happy with the people who are around me so far and I'm looking forward to adding new and inspiring people to my Inner Circle.

Maybe it's time you take inventory of those closest to you and make sure your surrounded by the best...that way you'll be your best too! always.....comment.....discuss.....let's start a dialogue.....peace n blessingz.....

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